Thursday, January 10, 2008

Swimming lessons - Session 3 Take 1

Some things really get my goat. Some things make me see red. Some things are so annoying I want to strangle someone.

1) People who take up the whole aisle when shopping that you have to stop and "ahem" or say "excuse me" so they move.
2) People who walk on the wrong side of the aisle or mall when they should follow stand American road practices. And then they walk in the middle so you can't get around them.
3) People who cannot make up their mind over the simplest things. Red or blue, sugar no sugar, buy or sell.
4) People who think their children walk on water and can do NO wrong.

So, number 1 and 2 happened to me today, but number 4 pushed me over the edge.
Jacob had swimming lessons again - Shrimp class for the third time. His class was full, three boys and three girls. Lots of new faces in the class, particularly a little angel named Ava.

The children follow Miss Stephanie over to the far end of the pool. They sit on the side, feet dangling, and wait patiently for their turn.

The order of children, Kurt (its his 3rd time too), Jacob, Parker, Turner or Hooch who just turned 5, and then the girls, little blond girl (her first time), girl with pigtails and then little princess Ava.

Ava's mom and friend/nanny were standing behind me. I mean directly behind me. I was sitting in my chair and could feel their breath on me. So I leaned forward so just in case their shallow words oozed onto me, I wouldn't catch it.

It first started by the two of them talking to each other with their conversation going something like this.
Friend/Nanny "Isn't she cute?"
Mom "She is so ready for this class! She is such a good listener!"
Friend/Nanny "Oh, look at her! She's so good!" At this moment her daughter was crawling around on the side of the pool, trying to play with the pool vent and then facing away from the teacher and standing on her head. Yes, she was trying to do headstands by the pool. I don't make this up, I just report it how I see it.
Friend/Nanny "She is sooo good! She's putting her hand by the vent! Isn't that cute?" By now the teacher has told Ava to sit on her bum a few times. This takes attention away from the other children and slows the class down.
Mom "She loves Little Kitty. I think I'm going to get her goggles. Do you think she needs goggles?"
Friend/Nanny "The only way she'd wear those things is they are Little Kitty and they have to have glitter or diamonds. " Miss Stephanie now has little Ava in the pool trying back float her. This kid is so uncomfortable she looks like a stiff octopus in the water. She's twisting and turning and not looking at all like a jr. Olympic swimmer.
Friend/Nanny "Isn't she good? She is so good!"
Mom, "Look at her! She's such a good listener! Her pigtails are so cute!"
Friend/Nanny "She got her pigtails wet"
Miss Stephanie has now moved on to another child and left Ava. Ava now is touching the other pig-tail girls hair and splashing her legs.
Friend/Nanny, "How deep is that pool?" "That looks like 2 Feet" She says this about 4 more times. Regulation pools have the depth stamped at each side of the pool. I guess she cannot read or does not have any common sense.

So you see why I wanted to strangle them? First of all, if my child was misbehaving and disrupting the class that badly, I would be embarrassed, not totally oblivious to what shes doing. I'd also have a talk with my misbehaving one after the class. She was very uncomfortable in the water and she really didn't want the teacher to touch her. Yet her mom and nanny/friend thought she was soooo good. And I forgot to mention all the talk about her swimsuit and how cute it was. And the pigtails.....

Okay, I've taken a long cleansing breath and gotten the bad our of my system.

John has not forgiven me for cutting his hair. He has been trying to pull mine out all day long. Jacob felt his hair needed a little haircut and cut a clump out in front. Luckily he has my thick hair and it really isn't too noticeable. It was my fault too because I forgot to put the scissors away in the bathroom. I can own up to my mistakes on the rare occasion that I make one. :)

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