Thursday, December 13, 2007

No more babies!

I caught myself twice today calling the babies kids instead of babies. Instead of saying, "the triplets need this or that, I ALWAYS say, the babies need this or that." The realization that they are closer to 2 than to 1 is very scary. I don't want them to get bigger. I love having babies (having them around, not HAVING them). The cuddling, looking at them sleeping in their cribs, the chubby cheeks, etc... The maternal instinct kicks in and I want more babies. But Dr. Acosta took care of that little issue during my C-section. He cut, tied and burned my fallopian tubes. Still, I have a 1 in about 500 chance that they will grow back. (I had a 1 in about 200 chance of having triplets too)

Its just hard knowing that these are my last babies. One side of me knows that a) Scott would move to Mexico if I hinted I wanted another child and b) we can't afford it. But on the otherhand there is nothing better than nursing and cuddling a little one. I love their sounds and smells. I guess the kids are going to be bathing in Johnson & Johnson for quite awhile yet.

About two years ago, on December 9th, 2005 at 2:45 p.m. Scott and I went in for an ultrasound because the Dr. thought I was measuring too big. I was 16 1/2 weeks at that point. The ultrasound tech smeared the goo all over my belly and she did that first initial swipe with the device. Even though the first swipe was probably only two to three seconds, I saw three heads on the screen very clearly. So a split second before she said, "I see three heads and I'm going to look for a fourth." I knew it. Its one of those situations I'll remember very clearly. I don't know if I said it outloud or thought it, but I said to myself, "you better not find a fourth" How scary is that? I don't believe in selective reduction. And I knew the chances of having three to full-term were slim to none... but four... almost none. And as Jacob says, "We get what we get and we don't throw a fit!" So I was praying for separate sacs and healthy children. Which if we fast-forward two years, we can see that they are very healthy.

So anyway, great memories, great experiences, but its all going too fast. I think I'm going to go crawl in bed with one of the babies. I'm sure the cribs can hold at least 150 to 200 pounds.
20 months and still growing!

1 comment:

Angela said...

What a sweet blog! I can't imagine seeing 3 heads on the screen. Two is more than enough!!!