I've put two and two together and figured out that Jacob can be more difficult (sassy, not listening, not kind to babies) after school on Tuesdays and Thursday. At first I thought it was just Shell Dinter coming over on Tuesdays, but since we just saw her on Wednesday and the behavior (Jacob's, not Shell's) was better, there goes that theory. :) (JK, BFF right Shell? Until Jacob sends you home)
The following conversation is based on actual events and the names and places has not been changed.
Jacob is sitting in the foyer playing with the the animals and barn. His look on his face is typical cranky Jacob mixed in with some frustration.
Mom: Jacob, who did you play with at school today?
Jacob: (Looking down at his toys and everywhere but me) I played with myself today.
Mom: You didn't play with anyone? Did you talk with anybody?
Jacob: No one wants to play with me.
I keep hearing this over and over in my head. My heart is breaking. I so want to fix his problem, but there is a fine line between being that intrusive mom and a mom that is supportive and helpful.
I sent Jacob's teacher a note telling her about the incident. We have discussed his shyness or unwillingness to try to join with the other kids. His self-confidence is really low in school too.
I told her that I was going to try role-playing with him. He and I could pretend that we were at school and he could ask me to play with him. He named a few boys that he'd like to ask to play.
I don't want him to be that kid that is always on the outside looking in. I want him to have friends. I want him to like school. I want him to have a positive self-image.
I'll gladly take suggestions.
Jacob plays well on playdates and with his cousins that are 7 & 9. I don't understand why there is such a different person at school.
An update on the full day kindergarten. I've decided to send Jacob for 1/2 days to start out next school year and as he asks to spend more time at school we'll add a day or two each week until he's fulltime. The kindergarten teacher seems to be fine with that. She's very understanding and she's also Jacob's preschool teacher.
I have talked to a few different moms whose children go 2 1/2 days (two full days and one 1/2 day) to kindergarten and to moms who have sent their children to 1/2 day kindergarten when full-time is offered and feel comfortable with this decision.
He'll be full-time in school in 1st grade and going 7+ hours a day is very tiring. Besides, I still want to do things with him and the babies in the afternoon. Or at least the opportunity to neglect the kid myself instead of him just playing by himself at school.